How To Deal With Disappointment: The Emotional Roller Coaster

In your life you have expectations about yourself, your job, spouse, children and life as well as about society and love. Disappointment will arise if expectations are not well managed or worked out.

How do you deal with disappointments and stay positive in life?

In my article Prevent Disappointment: How Do You Let Go of Your Expectations?, you can read how to prevent disappointments. First you need to know how you deal with disappointments now, if you succeed in this, you can go to the next step. That means letting go of your expectations. All those expectations you have in life are the cause of your disappointment.

Why do you have expectations?

Expectations arise from an image in your mind combined with emotions, which will define exactly how a situation that is about to happen will occur. If a situation turns out not to be in line with those expectations, disappointment will follow.

The emotional roller coaster stages

The first thing you will do is to think you are the cause of a disappointment. You will be in shock and denial, and all thoughts at that time will come from fear of loss, sadness and desire. You will end up with anger towards the other person and/or situation. This emotional roller coaster will happen in every situation involving change and disappointment.

This curve shows the emotions related to each stage of disappointment:

This curve shows the thoughts belonging to each of the emotions:

What to do next?

If you are aware of your thoughts and emotions, you will know exactly where you are in the curve. Be aware of your emotions and do not let them rule your life. Decisions based upon emotions in the fear and anger stage are taking you away from the real situation.

Take some time off and be in silence alone, or be with a good friend and let all out. Make sure you express your emotions. All your emotions not expressed will be captured in your body cells.

Eventually, that could lead to discomfort in your body or create diseases. After your emotions are expressed, you can start with accepting the situations and be able to commit and look forward to moving on. Then, you dry your tears, make a decision and follow up on your new actions.

Please do not give up on your dream by letting disappointment and fear stop you!

Marieke Stoop

For more literature on Change Management, see writing by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross.

Also read more in these articles:

• Prevent Disappointment: How Do You Let Go of Your Expectations?
• Lower Your Expectations; Free Up Your Mind and Prevent Disappointments